How to Deactivate Your Child's Facebook Account

Well. This is somewhat awkward, since a few months ago StreetSmartKidz.ca of Canada gave a tepid OK to parents about allowing their most valuable members of their lives the conditional "OK" to allow their kids to join Facebook.com. It's amazing how life changes in such a short span of time. One of my children has had a birthday and gone from 12 to 21. I've gained another 10 pounds and lost just as much hair. Check our safety video's for confirmation. You can actually see me age and bald by watching the video's in sequence.

FaceBook.com has also not aged gracefully. In the last six months, since we gave the "OK" to parents about allowing their children to join, they have gone through "4" security settings changes. These were NOT announced by FaceBook.com like a responsible company would, they decided to let CNN.com and FOX.com make the announcements through "Press Releases". As a parent, this means, you must check and/or reset your childs privacy settings every 30 days to be safe.

A predator can get into your house quicker through your computer than your front door. So, lets say you decide this just isn't worth the trouble/bother/danger and you have made the "Executive" leader of the house decision to elimanate Facebook.com until your child is 14 as apposed to Facebook.com guidelines which is 13 years of age.

You need to do the following, be determined because Facebook.com doesn't want to let you go, but it is easy to get out, if you don't get frustrated.

Here we go:

  1. go to the account menu on the top righthand corner, click on account settings, deactivate account, at this point you will be offered news updates from every friend, YouTube link you have ever watched and pictures of seals and polar bears who need you not to deactivate, be STRONG

  2. be tough and strong because, Facebook.com will confront you immediately with pictures of all of your friends and the captions will read " Sally will miss you", "John will miss you" and you will get one from every "friend" you have ever accepted

  3. Facebook.com will "DEMAND" you explain why your breaking up with them. I'm not kidding. You will not get off their site unless you explain why your leaving!!! The RCMP, FBI, OPP, and so on call this stalking and charge those involved. In Cyberland, it's called customer retention.

  4. Remove temptation to fall back into old habits. Opt out of receiving future emails, confirm, submit to disabling your profile, remove your name, picture and anything you've shared on FaceBook.com

  5. OR GO BIG AND STRONG! BE NUCLEAR! Permanently delete your/child's account, click on help, then search for "delete my account", follow the link and click on "submit your request here". The account will be deleted immediately, but it could take two or three weeks for Facebook.com to clear your information. They move slowly to delete and quickly to join.

  6. Keep a close eye on your child as they go through withdrawal of "needed" computer time. They may develope a sudden urge to play outside or need conversation time with a adult. (that's you)!

Steven Baird